Tag Archives: Arsenal

Deja Flippin’ Vu

Sweet Mother of Scorelines

This is my favourite kind of morning after. Trumps any other by a mile. The hangover infused eggs and mushrooms after an epic night out or a successful conquest of a particular nature (cough) can take a back seat. It’s a combo of 5 past Spurs, a come back from being a goal down, an Adebayor sent off, a goal due to Gallas gaff, Jack Wilshere going full English on monkey cunt and the rare sight of  entire Grove coming together which only happens on THIS particular fixture. I fucking love derby days.

I woke up this morning, looked at the scoreline again and couldn’t stop smiling. Positive expectations has been a far cry given our performances, or lack off, in the past few ordeals. My head calculated a narrow win, my heart cried COME ON ARSENAL and as usual, we conceded. 10 minutes in and Defoe took a shot that was saved by Wojciech but the pole couldn’t hold on and Adeayor helped finish it off. Anyone else, it wouldn’t have been this demoralizing but that cunt of all of them other cunts just make the sting worse. Like a bee poking his wasabi infused stinger in. Barely 10 minutes after his goal, twatnugget got straight red for going studs up on Santi. Howard, for once, thank you.

And that was it. If one needed an example how a sending off can change the momentum, look no further. It’s a bit puzzling because the cynic in me predicted a Defoe brace and he almost netted twice, thrice if you count the monkey cunt’s selfish attempt instead of making the ball for Defoe. But, surely you can’t let the performance of 10 men go downhill in sync because of a sent off so early on, especially Adebayor.

Jack vs. Monkey Cunt

I love our Jack. His ticking temper is a liability, no big secret. I was terrified of him being booked at anytime but watching him square off like that deserves a standing ovation. You can never trust the words of a professional footballer on “love” and “loyalty” for his current club but for Jack, it’s an illusion I like to indulge in just because he seems to push (aggravate) the perfect buttons. Szczesny too.

Happy Skippy Giant

The lovable giant equalized on the 28th minute from a wobbly Walcott cross, die prinz put us on the driving seat, Santi’s quick thinking of playing on instead of looking for a free kick resulted him squaring it to Giroud and he slid it in the net to make it 3-1. That man can slide anything past anyone’s net (cough) at this point, upholding his number 9 role brilliantly on his days. The fourth came from a brilliant Walcott – Podolski – Santi link up. A sight I would love to be more familiar with given they’ve had enough time to get to know each other’s way on the pitch. Only we know the feeling of being 4-1 up and still bricking it and monkey cunt making it 4-2 brought back those devastating memories. The fifth and final came from Theo lad, his 5 minutes of CF role paid off and as Le Grove would put it, pay him what he wants Arsene!

It’s been hard, the past few months. We’ve been deeply divided over the board, the management, the players, the wage structures ..but how sweet it is to have come together and cherish the fuck out of a proper demolition, a full hearted performance, a repeat of the same scoreline in matter of 9 months and yids walking out 80 minutes in.

How sweet it is.

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A tale of cards,a dodgy penalty,cuntbags & 3 lovely points – Salut!

I’ve written a blog before. But then I had a stalker. It wasn’t pretty and I covered my ass and deleted that. It’s a shame really. I would love to have a look at what kind of shit I wrote when I was 14. There was Arsenal in there of course. But then I think there was a lot of emo-ness too. Oh no my life sucks! *slits wrist* Oh no my daddy doesn’t love me! *swallows valium* Omg my chin is too big! *chugs Absolute Pickles* I never really cut myself or overdosed on pills. Can’t say the same about Absolute Pickles though. Life doesn’t suck so much anymore, I still have daddy issues and I am way over my appearance complexity. One thing of course stayed the same. And that is the Arsenal.

This is why I think football fans are one step above everyone else (except Yids). Everything else come and go, but football stays there. If high school mathematics has ever taught me anything, and I can assure you it didn’t teach me much, it is that a constant makes everything else less difficult. To this day, Arsenal has been my constant.

(There’s a chance that didn’t make sense but fuck that because I suck in maths )

So that should sum up that a) I love Arsenal b) I fucking love Arsenal and c) I love pickle flavored vodka.

Moving on from the introduction, a 3-0 victory at the Eastlands would not be something super spectacular 4-5 seasons ago. Three points. Yes. Clean sheet. Yes. But then today it’s not the Eastland anymore. It’s the Middle Eastland. This is nothing stereotypical but as far as I’m concerned most international fans love ManUtd or Real Madrid. Currently a lot them are leaning towards Barcelona but they barely stay up for a match. I highly doubt Sheikh Mansour is a ManCity fan. Unless he loves the Gallagher brothers from Oasis, I don’t see any reason why he should put his money on a club like that. So since I coudn’t find any valid reason, here’s the event that lead the Sheikh to buy citeh (courtesy of my mate):

Random guy: Hey dude,sup
Sheikh Mansour: Nm. The usual, lots of money, nowhere to spend on.
Randum guy: Yeah, Harems are so overrated.
Sheikh Mansour: Yeah.. I need to spend money on something
Random Guy: Hey, let’s buy a football club and buy like 17 strikers so someone will ALWAYS score
Sheikh Mansour: Yeah bro. Great idea. Imma buy city and like rip shit up with my money
Random guy: k bro. invite me!

So that’s that. I don’t think Spurs are contenders. Twitchy’s in charge so they bound to fuck up mid season. But Citeh on the other hand is something we’ve all started to dread. Please don’t judge me because I missed the red card as I was making a sandwich for myself in the kitchen (where,apparently,I belong). But the card situation was really all over the place. Especially knowing we had 5 players on the field with yellow was nerve wrecking. I have nothing to say about Nasri apart from how superb he is getting each match. I remember him from 5 seasons ago and I rooted for him to come to Arsenal. I can assure you I felt mighty wise when he did. Well not that wise. Young french starlet bound to end up at Arsenal *cough*. Lots of people were suggesting Nasri should have taken the penalty but face it, it wasn’t a world class peno but then again it wasn’t a world class save either. Don’t you hate it when English commentators glorifies English keepers..oh wait.

I don’t want to over hype the Song goal because he pisses me off too much. One of these days we are going to drop very valuable points simply because he didn’t stick to his position. The Last Hair Bendtner’s (thanks Yani <3) goal was the ultimate finisher, but of course it’s our little Samir who gets the “Hurrahs” for setting him up. I mean holy fuck could this boy be any better! I see good days ahead with Jackie and Samir. And Tomas. I fucking love Tomas. It’s so good to see him at his best.

I think I’d leave it to this. Midweek game ahead with Newcastle. I can’t wait to see my Geordie brother weep. He’s going to hit me. I know it. But it’s no surprise considering he loves Andy Carrol and Joey Barton.

Until next time… au revoir.

P.S. Big thanks to Alex McNamara for inspiring me to start fresh.

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